Some things are jus not right

Having trouble uploading all the pictures. Seriously. The connection's damn bad. I'm having difficulty falling asleep again. And I hav no idea why. I should be able to slp with the help of alcohol. I think I over-relied on it somehow. But still, it got better as I relied on pills to slp for the last couple of months. Jus had an awesome blast fun on stepdad's birthday celebration. I wish birthdays could happen every single day. I wish my birthday was everyday. My mom had her fair share of fun too. Tonight's gonna be yet another long night. I can't seem to come out with the correct words to fill in the blanks. My emotions are contradicting. They are so messy I don't know. I wish somebody could tell me the things I want to know.